Dear Reader's
I'd like to dedicate this blog to those of us starting in a new relationship or thinking about being in one. or maybe you are single and are envying those of us in relationships.
First of all i would like to clear this up relationships are not a fairytale. in february i met my boyfriend. our first date was march 1st. i remember it as if it was yesterday. I showed up early and as i waited at tim hortons for kenneth to show up i played games on my phone. then there was a moment as i looked up and saw him. i thought oh my gosh i must be in a dream, this guy is the best looking man i have ever seen. an hour felt like eternity talking to kenneth the laughter the smiles. i knew i wanted to see this guy again. as i got home later that night he called to check that i was home safe. i knew that night that we would date it was a matter of time. in a process of over a month we took things fast. to me this is normal a guy must like me if things are fast paced. on april 11 2013 kenneth and i started dating. at this time he was in school for enviromental engineering just preaparing for exams. so for 2 or 3 weeks when we first started dating we did not talk.for me that was torture cause one of my love languages is quality time. since we had started dating its not been an easy go. there is times we dont speak at all. i do not enjoy the silence. yet it is in the silence I find God speaking to the depths of my heart. I have not seen kenneth for a while now. he moved an hour and a half away. to be honest the old me would of thrown the towel in by now, the holy spirit is speaking to me alot through this. like who is control of the relationship him or I?
To be honest I believe that this is a time where God is building the foundations of this relationship. its all about God not kenneth and I. sure we would love to be with each other more, enjoying each others presence. but right now we have to work through things and let Gods will be done in this relationship. the easy part is seeing each other the hard part is not knowing when we will see each other next, not knowing when we will have time for each other. to be honest this relationship is a huge faith builder. I cannot depend on kenneth's strengths alone. If God is first in this then I must epend on him not kenneth. if my thoughts are more about kenneth then God then i am placing kenneth on a pedastal of being better then God. this is not how a relationship works. if God is truly first in this relationship it is God that has to be placed higher then everything . since when does a relationship that is centred on God become all about what i want. all about me.... this is a selfish mindset. what is it that God wants of us.... i truly believe that God has a huge destiny and i have to learn these important things now for God takes us through Hard stuff so we can grow and change. its not fun but its worth it. If I talked to kenneth daily i would personally become emotionally dependant on him and thats not fair. it is in the silence that God draws closest to us.
I hope this makes sense to you. for those of you who are single it pays to be gracious and patient. God is your husband i know right it's not the same as a human man haha but he has your best interest in mind he will never fail you never hurt you. you can trust God with your heart. for those of you just starting a relationship. it's cool to take things slow. not to rush into things that you invest so much time and energy into. It is important not to rush anything having a solid foundation makes a difference when the hard times come and you dont want to love that person. as well it is healthy to talk to other couples who are older for advice. you know keep accountable. as well never be afraid to talk about things. girls if your guy does something that you really love dont be afraid to tell him and if he does something that you dont like dont be afraid to tell him either. He will appreciate you more in the long run.
Elz:)
