hide and go seek

Dear  Readers
  Let's  just  get straight to the point.  lately  I  have had  every  opportunity to  run and to hide away  instead of  dealing  with some  pretty hard things.  i know i tend to  take on things i don't  have to.  I've  been  holding little  mini  pity  parties for myself. Really  who doesn't  every  once in awhile.
   I  have  to face  some  giants in my life and i  would  rather   hide  and  not have to  face up.  most  of  you  must  be  thinking  what is she talking  about?  Saturday  night i went to support my  brother  at his hockey  game. i  honestly wanted to get the heck out of there.  i  felt like an outsider  looking in. you  know if you are  lost you  want to be found. It  was as if i  wasn't  even there.  i had to  try not to cry  but  i had  small  tears  streaming down my face.  thinking  God  i know  i belong   but  what  is going on?people love me 
  About   9 or  10 years ago i went through the  exact same thing at  my parents church.  when i left  i ran away  from everyone i  mean  at this point  i  hardly  knew God. God felt  so far away from me.  but i knew that  he existed.  so i  ran away and  came  to  crossroads community  church.
  you  see  the  very  same  deal  minus  i  have a  relationship with God now.  everything in me wants  to  run.  but  I  won't  that's  not the  right thing to do. I'm not a  runner  anymore  i am a God  seeker. I  want  nothing but  God's  best.
  just before  i  moved out  there was another place that I  almost moved to  but  my mom told me no  your attitude is all wrong this is a  waiting season so just wait out and  let God  change your  heart and attitude.  I  didn't  want to hear that at all!!! anyways god  blessed  me  with a way  better place and  it  pays to wait  on God rather then  rush  and  run.
  If you are out there reading this and  any of this resonates with you. you  need to know that  though it is  a hard   i mean a very  hard place to be.  it is  never  worth running away  from your  problems. you  can  run but you can not  hide!! sometimes you  need to face the giants no matter how  hard  no matter how much you  do not  want to.  but it's  the  right thing to do.trust and believe. let God's  truth set you  free


elz